tell me what you do with a day off

home from work today with hot coffee and the last drops of aunty mary's homemade kahlua.

i'd planned to (and did) take home all my work and laptop home last night in case roads were bad. the ice was bad enough that they did cancel classes and more importantly closed the college which means i got to stay home guilt free. and maybe work free. it's 9am and no one has emailed.

it started with me doing the media closings at 4:30am. flipping through channels in my pjs to wind down. a brief nap with bowser then answering a few phone calls. okay. that was work. but none of these activities required me to leave the comfort of my pj pants.

just finished the last cheesy bites of my homemade egg and cheese muffin and plan to plant in front of the tv for the better part of the day. the neglected bathroom may nag me for a cleaning. maybe a load or two of laundry, but i don't mind. but i WILL NOT spend this day deep cleaning the house like i did when i was home on mlk day. nope. nothingness is in order.

you should probably tell me what you would do with one day off. 1-you can't leave the house due to hazardous road conditions. 2- you can't spend any money. okay, go!

tell me what you want / wish

i want to be told what to read. loan me a book. tell me what it meant to you. a list. a top 100 list. of books to read before you die. i kept a print out. a copy of a copy times 100. of the books a student should read before college. i was given at an aptitude testing facility. about 150 books, poems, plays. short stories. to this day i've likely read 15 on the list. and that was because i was in ap english in high school. i threw the list away in 2003. and stopped reading. except for the worn copy of mere christianity i pick up each year. read two chapters and stop again. thanks to my boss, i'm reading a book. that is now a movie. and had the film not been made. i would have never known it existed. man.

tell me what to watch. a movie. something old. "classic." i want to watch films. made when cinema was an art form. when there was a new wave. because there was an old wave. when film. tangible. was edited by hand. i want to be in yevtushenko's class. which i slept through. and made a c. i made a lot of c's in my film classes. made a b in kubrick&hitchcock. i want nights of cabria. i want the bicycle thieves. i want to watch jules et jim in your apartment. i want to see those films you dropped off at the library. i wish i wouldn't have made fun of manhattan. and 2001. i vow to utilize my netflix subscription.

i want to tell you how much you mean to him. how much you mean to her. to them. i want you to know how special you are. and how your hopes will come true.


you should probably tell me. what you want. what you wish.

just dance

like lady gaga toldja to. and like i did in my car all over tulsa looking for manchega.

songs that made me happy-
bros- panda bear
boys- m.i.a.
grounds for divorce- elbow
ragged wood- fleet foxes

i know the list looks pretentious and / or lame depending on the sophistication level of your ear-- nay-- interest in general. i openly admit that 94% of the music i like i heard first on xm radio. it's a magnificent tool to find music, old or new. i can't say enough about it.

was it jesse or tony who said my music collection was lame. it was one of those boys. and i'll always remember it. and always agree. but like what you like, ya know? people will judge you. i'll judge you. but your very faves, they make you happy don't they.

you should probably tell me what music makes you shimmy shake these days.

give yourself a hug

i felt like i deserved my job today.

it isn't that i'm anything special. but this position was very sought after. there was a massive round of hiring in spring that i was overlooked for. those candidates were all dropped. then a second round just as i was laid off from the tv station. i got some amazing strings pulled from some amazing people and was considered this time. it took four rounds of interviews. and i got it. that means a lot to me.

some days aren't so good. i feel in over my head. it's a new industry with new issues and new lingo. but essentially i know how to do my job. it's making my skills (talents, i hope) work where i am now.

today i felt like i deserved being the one. after all those rounds and all those people. nothing special. but i was asked to sit in on several projects. my opinion was sought. i put in my two cents and was praised. i landed two media stories. i was worn out by 3pm. and now i'm about to watch a positive story on my employer on a local tv station. heart.

so i give myself a hug today. and i want to give one to you.

i hope you give yourself hugs. that you have days when you think "i'm a great mom" or "i'm a kick ass driver." maybe "someone should pay me for this amazing oatmeal i made." or maybe you feel like you did a good job at your...job. these are tough times. and i refuse to be worried. i want to celebrate small victories.

so, you should probably give yourself a hug. leave me a note and let me know why.